Author and Friends

Posted in Others' Views, Return to your true created essence, Thoughtful Living

VICTIM

Victim. We should only be allowed to use this word to describe a moment in time where something was done to us that was out of our control. It should be an adjective to describe our experience in a tragedy, not to define our character. That moment does not define us. It can mold us, but we have the choice to allow it to continue to victimize us and be subjected to the powerlessness of that situation or we have the ability to become a warrior.

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Posted in Affects of Sexual Abuse: LIES, Bite Size Bible Truth, Return to your true created essence, Thoughtful Living

EXPOSED TO LIGHT

After what we have experienced in secret the idea of being exposed is quite painful. Had we not already had our bodies exposed to lustful eyes and hands? Yes! However the illumination I speak of has an opposite and profound effect on returning to our pre-abuse identity. Leading us out of a fear filled lonely place to a place of joy filled resilience and healing.

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Posted in Return to your true created essence, Thoughtful Living

A HAVEN FOR HEALING

Find your healing space. Create your haven. When organizing a home for clients, where there was hoarding or just messy chaos, I would first carve out a place for the client. To be a refuge from their inner trauma or their addiction to hoarding. Maybe they needed a place to escape the chaos from a partner or child that was troubled with alcoholism, codependency, or other unhealthy tendencies.  

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Posted in Others' Views, Return to your true created essence, Thoughtful Living

Trauma and Silence

“Both the cross and the lynching tree were symbols of terror, instruments of torture and execution, reserved primarily for slaves, criminals, and insurrectionists—the lowest of the low in society.”

Father Richard Shares……Today I share a contemplative poem from CAC friend and writer Felicia Murrell. Felicia’s words combine a deep awareness of God’s presence while clearly naming the collective trauma of police brutality and lynchings. It is worth remembering, as Black liberation theologian James Cone (1938–2018) points out, that the lynchings of African Americans and the crucifixion of Jesus share much in common: “Both the cross and the lynching tree were symbols of terror, instruments of torture and execution, reserved primarily for slaves, criminals, and insurrectionists—the lowest of the low in society.” [1] There is something about poetry that gives us permission to sit with the paradoxes of our pain, perhaps especially when addressing traumatic suffering. I invite you to read Felicia’s challenging words slowly, allowing your heart to break open to God’s love amidst the suffering of the world.

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Posted in Affects of Sexual Abuse: LIES, Bite Size Bible Truth, Spiritual Warfare, Thoughtful Living

INNER VOICE : FRIEND OR FOE

Is our inner voice original thought, or guided by someone or something else? If you found your way here, you have experienced abuse or trauma in some capacity. Your mind may be battling with you daily, obsessive thoughts try to guide you one way. Fight you when you desire to go another. It can encompass self-destructive beliefs, self-destructive behaviors, addiction, fear, chronic nightmares. Your anxious thoughts trigger your, PTSD symptoms. Your inner voice may be continually condemning you- that you are flawed, less than, or of no value to anyone including yourself. We will discover together that these are lies, we can capture these thoughts, reckon with them and finally choose to replace the lies with truth.

Posted in Affects of Sexual Abuse: LIES, Spiritual Warfare

What hinders thriving after surviving?

On whom will we listen and depend on for guidance? 

As humans, we have collectively fought the odds of survival. Whether from climate, disease, or abandonment. Surviving is something we do! Going beyond survival; thriving after is vexing; trusting our unseen Creator’s voice and guidance, after defeat or mistreatment, becomes the real test of valor.  

We rely on our thoughts to be self-generated and a reliable guide. It seems as natural as breathing to believe our thoughts are safely generated by us and intended for our own good. We act off of our thoughts or when feeling inadequate, will lean towards co-dependency, attempting to draw strength from another person. believing without them survival may not be possible. 

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Posted in Affects of Sexual Abuse: LIES, Inner Child

Seeking Inner Peace

Are you doubtful that true inner peace can be found? 

Abuse, incest, neglect, trafficking, rape all invades us. Our minds are flooded with fear, terror, isolation, pain, and threats of death. But more than this! We ingest messages that no one cares, no one can be trusted, God has let us down. Perhaps you believe you are ugly, useless, unteachable, destined for poverty, disgrace and loneliness because you are of no value or unlovable. Our very soul, our very essence hides or feels as if it has been ripped loose from us.   

                                                                  STOP HERE! All LIES! 

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Posted in Return to your true created essence

WATER FROM A ROCK

 An account in Exodus finds Moses’ people grumbling at their accommodations in the wilderness. They are in the wilderness due to rebellion and yet Moses cries out to God, asking to supply them with food and water. He is instructed by God to strike his staff on the rock and water would flow. Did they need another intervention, another miracle? Well, the folks who drank from this streaming rock had already been rescued from slavery, through a parted sea! They continued to worship other gods-idols, and so remained dissatisfied, demanding, and disloyal to the Creator of all. Boy-oh-boy, if we saw such a miracle would we not believe in that God?   

Spiritual Bondage and dissatisfaction go hand in hand. The shadow of death entices us to desire things that will lead us to dissatisfaction and death. The very things we desire; turn against us if not from God. Allow me to take you back to when I was wandering in the wilderness.

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