I am weary. I have been writing and revising my manuscript for four years now. In writing a memoir, there is the apparent need to go back through the trauma experienced. I have found continued healing while going through this process of writing. The positives are that this going back also reinforces the lessons, techniques and prayer practices that have brought me out of darkness into a world of recovery and true freedom.Continue reading “Moments of Weariness in our Journey”
For survivors of trauma and addiction, roadblocks were put in place before we realized it. We remain unaware that a roadblock exists, believing we are just like everyone else, until we try to expand ourselves into an adult individual. If we have successes great! But such is life, and there are challenges all along our way. There is illness, loss, death, lost jobs, financial uncertainties, or isolation from families.Continue reading “Who put the road block in place?”
I can see the beauty of being a rock in God’s creation. Not a sedentary rock, for when unearthed, I would be moved from place to place. At times, hidden and forgotten. Then a twist of fate would unearth me again. For a time, placed as the centerpiece in a garden. Jagged, rough edges in the beginning, but the friction of life and torrent rains refined and polished me. Now my destination is assured as I have become a paperweight sitting prominently on God’s desk. My polished shine radiates with reflective light attracting others to be soothed by my cool smoothness. This smoothness with signs of wear offers many opportunities, sometimes to bring others beauty, sometimes to help others offering foundational support, and at all times, to be still and take in the beauty that surrounds me in His garden.
After what we have experienced in secret the idea of being exposed is quite painful. Had we not already had our bodies exposed to lustful eyes and hands? Yes! However the illumination I speak of has an opposite and profound effect on returning to our pre-abuse identity. Leading us out of a fear filled lonely place to a place of joy filled resilience and healing.Continue reading “EXPOSED TO LIGHT”
Find your healing space. Create your haven. When organizing a home for clients, where there was hoarding or just messy chaos, I would first carve out a place for the client. To be a refuge from their inner trauma or their addiction to hoarding. Maybe they needed a place to escape the chaos from a partner or child that was troubled with alcoholism, codependency, or other unhealthy tendencies.Continue reading “A HAVEN FOR HEALING”
Is our inner voice original thought, or guided by someone or something else? If you found your way here, you have experienced abuse or trauma in some capacity. Your mind may be battling with you daily, obsessive thoughts try to guide you one way. Fight you when you desire to go another. It can encompass self-destructive beliefs, self-destructive behaviors, addiction, fear, chronic nightmares. Your anxious thoughts trigger your, PTSD symptoms. Your inner voice may be continually condemning you- that you are flawed, less than, or of no value to anyone including yourself. We will discover together that these are lies, we can capture these thoughts, reckon with them and finally choose to replace the lies with truth.
I am a particular flavor of bold personality, the type that is not well-liked in some environments. Take, for example, a well-established hierarchical-based company that relies on its employees not seeing, the whole picture in order to remain in their jobs. Indeed, I am not very well-liked there because I am a Disruptor. I speak the truth no one else there dares to speak due to its disruptive nature. I can’t help it. That’s what I do. Even my mom tells me this frequently, although when she does it comes with negative connotations.Continue reading “I’m not very well-liked. No, let me try that again.”